When I was a kid, I used to read the TV listings magazine from cover to cover. Most of the time, it was just the "TV Weekly" magazine which came with our local newspaper. But every once in a while I'd lay my hands on a copy of the real deal, a TV Guide.
The Holy Grail of television listings - and just about as elusive in my world.
My parents wouldn't buy TV Guide because it was too expensive. Same for my friends' families. In my mind, this meant that anyone who bought TV Guide must be rich.
Like my cousin's family. They had TV Guide - by subscription. AND a console TV downstairs that was just for the kids. AND an above-ground vinyl pool. Super-rich.
(the super-fun super-rich frolicking in the 70's)But I didn't get to go over there very often, so I rarely got a glimpse of a current TV Guide. Luckily, I loved the out-of-date ones just as much, and devoured them with just as much passion. Because I wasn't actually reading them to find out what was going to be on television. No, I was just as keen to read about what had already been on. Full immersion in the trivialities of TV culture!
So while everyone else was watching Happy Days, I was reading about it. Usually well after the show had aired. In fact, I didn't really like the show all that much. Even as a child, I knew I should cringe every time Mr. and Mrs. Cunningham talked about being 'frisky'.
There were a couple of huge upsides to the many hours I spent buried in the TV listings:
- First, as a kid, I could actively participate in all the important kid conversations at school. Like, who was our favourite Brady. (Hint: it wasn't Jan)
- Second, as a young adult many years later, I absolutely killed the competition in a game of Trivial Pursuit, TV Edition. (Question: were those wedges cheeses or pies?? We never really reached consensus...)
Which brings me to the modern-day equivalent - TV by Twitter
TV Guide is not what it used to be... it's primarily an on-line service now. Looks like Yahoo's OMG! but without all the Kardashians and bad grammar. But then again, TV isn't what it used to be either. Programs aren't just on network TV anymore and shows are increasingly delivered on-line (gosh, remember when cable was new??)
So how does a girl stay current with today's TV trivialities?
Well, by keeping a sharp eye on my Twitter feed and creeping a few Facebook friends, I find that I can remain fully up to speed even without a dog-eared copy of TV Guide in my hands.
Will Don Draper let his demons get the best of him... again? Will Greatjon Umber return to the story, but with a rather ragged ear? Will Dame Maggie Smith be able to hide her real-life pregnancy in the folds of her voluminous Downton dresses, or will she be killed off instead? (ok, I kind of made that one up).
Needless to say, it's childhood revisited. I still don't have to actually watch any of these programs to keep track of what's going on. Yet I can still pretend that I do.
- I can participate in all the important adult conversations. Like whether Walter White is a good man driven to bad choices, or a bad man who simply found an opportunity.
- I will be able to kill the competition if and when (hint: business opportunity!) the new app "Trivia With Friends, TMZ Edition" launches.
